Gone for good

The feeling of restless, of encroaching death that I had been feeling for the past two months finally went away. For death finally stepped outside of the shadows, it showed its face on the doorstep of my cousin sister. The last person I expected it to visit.

It was all like a scene from a movie or a horrifying novel chapter I must have read long ago. A text message arrives, not intended for me, but I read it anyway.

She’s dead it said. Dead. How can it be? How can it be when I just met her? Just? exactly two years ago. Exactly two years ago. What cruel fate is this? How can SHE be taken away?

She was in pain, yes. She was suffering yes but to have all her misery end like this? Shouldn’t she have had a chance to live a life not filled with sorrow and pity? Didn’t she deserve happiness?

What peace is this that she would find only in death? She didn’t deserve what this life offered her… so why do I find it hard to come to terms with the fact that now no one will ever hurt her again. I should be glad her ordeal has ended but why couldn’t we try .. try harder to ensure she could live a LIFE free of the horrors she had to face.

She was an innocent. Never caused anyone harm. Anyone. She didn’t deserve it.

If she’s at peace, I worry for the life of those she left behind.

If? I know she’s at peace. Which should warn us all who stood by and did nothing to help her of the imminent and grave fate that awaits us. We who failed her. We who never answered to her unspoken pleas.

How can we ask for her forgiveness now?

Rest in peace, D. You will never be forgotten. I know it will sound hollow but I wish I had been a better sister to you. I wish we could have had happier times.

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